Starting to Understand

After looking at some of my old posts I think I am starting to understand.  I prayed and prayed for over a year.  I thought if I did this or that or because I did this or that, that explained why I wasn't getting pregnant.  I try so hard to control everything, thinking if I don't worry enough it won't seem important.  Now presented with an awesome opportunity I have applied to graduate school (currently praying for the money for that!).  Let the worrying begin!  But this time I have started with a new prayer, not let this go well for me, let me have it.  Rather yet, I pray the prayers I think I have started to understand.  Just as I started to change my prayer for a baby from give me to help me to understand my plan.  Realizing that I can't control everything (if you doubt this, see future posts concerning $300.00 car seats, insane requirements for childcare providers, not having a pool, requiring dear husband to go out in groups while he is out of town.)  So I am not saying I am cured of worry(by any stretch, believe you me), but I am starting to understand, perhaps I am not in control as much as I think.

Maybe all this busyness of new baby, 3 year old, weekend school, papers, projects, et cetera have helped to relinquish some of my insanity.  Not feeling so anxious when the sink isn't empty at the end of the night or when said 3 year old is covered in blue finger paint (while wearing a solid white uniform shirt!).  Wondering how it is possible that a 3 year old can spill an entire glass of water but you don't seem to find it until you are wearing fresh, clean socks.   Wondering if I will ever have clean floors in this century.  But alas, I digress. 

Really it is my mission to not feel the need to worry about everything and instead pray and let it go and include those that will help me reach my goal and pass up those who don't. Mmmm, now if only I could do that fully.

Week 13 and Week 17!

I didn't think much had changed until I saw these pics together! Same shirt, different lighting.
We are sooooo excited!!

Pondering...

I read this quote in class this weekend. It is nice for perspective. In the spirit of Lindsey's post, I thought it nice to share.

If you woke up this morning
with more health than illness,
you are more blessed than the
million who won't survive the week.

Danger of battle

If you have never experienced
the danger of battle,
the loneliness of imprisonment,
the agony of torture or
the pangs of starvation,
you are ahead of 20 million people
around the world.

No torture

If you attend a church meeting
without fear of harassment,
arrest, torture, or death,
you are more blessed than almost
three billion people in the world.

A place to sleep

If you have food in your refrigerator,
clothes on your back, a roof over
your head and a place to sleep,
you are richer than 75% of this world.

Top eight percent

If you have money in the bank,
in your wallet, and spare change
in a dish someplace, you are among
the top 8% of the world's wealthy.

Parents still married

If your parents are still married and alive,
you are very rare,
especially in the United States.

Smile on your face

If you hold up your head with a smile
on your face and are truly thankful,
you are blessed because the majority can,
but most do not.

God's healing touch

If you can hold someone's hand, hug them
or even touch them on the shoulder,
you are blessed because you can
offer God's healing touch.

If you can read

If you can read this message,
you are more blessed than over
two billion people in the world
that cannot read anything at all.

You are so blessed in ways
you may never even know.